Wow, has it really been that long since I posted?! Geez, where did I go? Well, we just went on a trip to Seattle to attend our Godson’s baptism, and I meant to post before we left. There was just so much going on. I was kind of hesitant to fly this late into pregnancy, but according to my doctor, I’m not really that late into my pregnancy where it would affect me flying anywhere. I guess we got our Babymoon–a trip couples go on before the baby arrives–and that was really cool because our friends who are the parents of our Godson actually flew us up there on their dime and hosted us in their home. Pretty sweet!
The last time we talked, I just moved into our new place. The dust is settling, and most of our space looks pretty normal except for the baby’s room. That room is pretty much a storage closet right now. However, that will be changing soon since a garage space became available in our apartment complex so we now have that to use. Any excess boxes can go there and we can finally get things rocking and rolling and ready for baby girl. I’m actually really excited about that because I’ve finally decided on a nautical theme for her nursery, and our furniture and some of the decor I have already fit into that style.
It’s so wonderful how many people are willing to give you things for your unborn child just because they want to. So far, we’ve already got a crib, a bassinet, and some baby girl clothes on the way. I’m not sure if people are just eager to clear out their own spaces and we’re doing them a favor by taking it off of their hands, but either way I’m definitely blessed by it. One of my other pregnant girlfriends said she’s basically getting everything her and her husband need from her friends and won’t really have to buy anything. This is why I’m glad I waited on the registry thing too.
I never felt and urge to hurry up and add things to a list of what I want people to buy for me, and now it’s even more clear to me that there will be so many things I won’t even need to register for because they’ll be given to me beforehand. Someone said to me that at baby showers, people basically buy what they want to buy and what reminds them of you. Most of the items you actually register for, you won’t really get because everyone wants to buy a cute onesie and blankets. I don’t blame them, but it seems that the families of the parents’ usually take up the bulk of buying the necessities and everything still works out in the end.
Having so many people there for me during this time has really changed my life. My mom and I had a really deep discussion the other day and it opened my eyes to a lot of aspects about myself. Most of them were not so pleasant. I’ll stick to the major one and spare you the details of my entire life. When I got married, I had a very backwards way of looking at independence. I’ve always had a hard time asking for help, but because I was now a “grownup” with a husband, that was magnified by a zillion. I figured you get married, move out, and everything is on you to make it through life. I had my husband, my household, and my career to think about and that was my focus so that everything didn’t fall apart. It’s okay to do that to a certain degree, you don’t want to be completely reliant and refuse to mature once you hit your independence, but to shut out most help and carry the burden of life on your own is very dangerous. I know my family relationships suffered a great deal because of that mentality, and I wish I could go back in time and change it.
Now that I’ve got a little precious in my womb, everything about my perspective and priorities have shifted. I used to think, “When I have kids, I don’t want to burden anyone else with the responsibility of raising them. I’ll only ask for help if it’s absolutely necessary.” Children are not a burden, they are a reward. The bible even says so in Psalm 127:3-5. With my old mentality, I probably would have waved off any help from the outside thinking “No, that’s okay. I’ll take care of everything.” and–from what I’ve been told from others–that usually comes off as “Mine. Mine. Mine. I don’t want your help.” It’s crazy how things are perceived versus what you think you’re putting out there. I just thought I was being responsible and mature, but relationships are so important and sharing each other’s life/burdens/blessings is what we’re called to do. Thank you Lord for revealing that to me over and over again. Once I got that stuck in my head, I’ve been able to release a lot of control to other people and not get major anxiety that everything is going to fall apart.
Another thing I’ve been learning a lot about is just how natural this process is. I’m not one to say that pregnancy is painless and so beautiful and parenting is the best thing ever. I’m just not worried about it. So many people ask me if I’m ready, what are my plans for this and that, am I afraid, did I make sure to figure this and that out ahead of time, etc. I’m not lazy about it, but I really don’t think most of the things people do to prepare are necessary. You can watch as many live births as you want, take as many classes as you like, and prepare for the apocalypse at the same time, but no one really knows what their journey is going to be like. At this moment I’m mostly interested in decorating my home, not wasting money, not letting a bunch of chemicals in my house, and breastfeeding the right way. My focus may change from week to week, but it’s happening pretty organically and things are lining up in great timing.
I’ve found some great gals online that talk about that kind of thing without being super judgmental about other people who don’t do things the same way. I stumbled upon “Ashley’s Green Life” when I was looking at ideas for pumping and breastfeeding. She has some awesome knowledge on that, essential oils, keeping your house free of toxins, going green with everything, etc.
Another YouTuber “Mama Natural” has some great advice on a natural delivery, preparing your body for childbirth, maintaining good health, etc. She even mentions the book I talked about several weeks back called Supernatural Childbirth when she’s explaining her labor experience.
I’m sure there are a ton of other useful women online, but those are two that I really like and wanted to share. Speaking of sharing, let’s share those stats!
Age and size of baby:
29 weeks old, 17 inches long, 2.9 lbs in weight.
Cravings:
Carbs are nice. Anything with rice, potatoes, or pasta can get in my belly! I’m really in love with salads and avocados. I can also go for a chocolate treat pretty often too.
Morning sickness:
I’m pleased to say that I haven’t even thrown up since my last post! I do notice my stomach is being squished, so I have to take my time with a big meal so that I don’t accidentally burp up my last spoonful. I know, TMI.
Stretch marks:
Nothing new, but I am noticing my belly button getting more flat and the skin around it tightening.
Crazy hormones:
So, can I just cry over everything, or is that not normal? I can usually stop myself from actually crying, but when I’m exhausted that makes it much harder. Our trip to Seattle began with a red-eye flight arrival into the city. My husband and I didn’t sleep the night before, so when we finally landed and some rude people were bum-rushing my husband when he was trying to get our bags from the overhead bin, it made me really sad and I started crying in the airport like, “Why is everyone so mean?”
Sleeping habits:
Sleep has been pretty good lately. Sometimes I have this restless leg syndrome thing where my legs just want to start kicking on their own. That’s really annoying, but cutting out caffeine and sugar before bed has helped a lot. Also, I don’t feel like I need as many pillows or support, I just have to be careful how I’m laying because if I have too much weight on my uterus, baby girl likes to start kicking me.
So, that’s that for now. Be blessed and take time to make your dreams into your reality.
-Kytia L’amour